Monday, April 6, 2009

Potential New Careers For Rex Grossman: Social Deviant

One of the sad things about college athletes is a common failure to see that 99% of them will end up as mechanics or cops or something that isn't pro-athlete, something they might have realized had they managed to pass statistics.


Your fallback is violin

Unfortunately for many college athletes, other professional interests if they don't manage to go pro often involve Xbox or the sweet release of death. This is where the vaunted bullshit major comes in, the academic equivalent of this:


Which means that Rex's fallback degree is a bachelor's in "Leisure Management".

Rex forgets that the bullshit major is still kind of a secret, and attempts to blow it for everyone in the Sun-Times, cached here:

''I remember taking a class on stress and anxiety management, and for one period -- an hourlong class -- you had to bring in a pillow and take a nap,'' Grossman said.

The major requires a 2.0 GPA, as it does not require the ability to count to 3.

The rest academic course load at the University of Florida includes pretty much you're thinking, and in addition, this cryptic offering:

LEI 4770 Leisure Services for the Socially Deviant.
Credits: 3.
Principles and practices in planning and implementing programs for socially deviant.


I think that this means that Rex is either qualified to administer fun activities for prisoners, or host BDSM parties.


Or both. 

2 comments:

  1. lol

    I'm a Bears Fan.

    This was a good read. lol

    Thank god for Cutler!

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